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For the love of Cobra Kai, did we really need a remake of The Karate Kid? The seminal '80s coming of age film, the movie that made many a Greed Decade 98-lb. middle school weakling run to their local dojo for a lesson in self defense (and the disappointment of no "wax on, wax off") is now a vehicle for the aging Jackie Chan, the far-too-young Jaden Smith (taking his version of Daniel-san all the way back to junior high) and, of all things, The People's Republic of China. Though the title continues to reference the Japanese-based martial art, we are moving even farther East to give kung fu its shot at pre-adolescent affirmation.
Popular kid Dre (Smith) is forced to leave his Detroit home when his Mom (Taraji P. Henson) gets transferred by the automotive interest she works for. The kicker? His new home is 6637 miles West...in China! At school, he befriends a talented violinist named Mei Ying (Wenwen Han) and continually runs afoul of notorious bully Cheng (Zhenwei Wang). One day, the maintenance man in his apartment building, Mr. Han (Chan), helps Dre out of another embarrassing beat down. Through some necessary plot contrivances, the old man convinces Cheng's master to let the newcomer enter an important kung fu tournament. As a result, Mr. Han becomes Dre's reluctant instructor, preparing him for what will eventually be a brutal contest.
The new Karate Kid lies somewhere between a success and cinematic blasphemy. Either you'll find it a rousing crowd-pleaser filled with heroes and villains and proper emotional beats, or it will represent the continuing rape of your already tenuous wonder years. It's hard to see a middle ground in the overly familiar material, especially since Chan and Smith hardly represent underdogs needing our collective concern. Those looking for parallels will either love or hate the "jacket on, jacket off" moment, as well as the crane-like snake move in the finale. Those with little frame of reference may well find themselves pleased with the well-worn and often crowd-pleasing storyline, but those who remember the original with formative fondness will probably just be aggravated.
There are other problems here as well. The movie is more padded than a supermodel's bra, clocking in at well over two hours. And not for a moment do we believe that Dre is really in trouble, even as Central Casting baddies beat him mercilessly. Similarly, though the choreography suggests a horrific ending to the tournament, the manipulative plot makes sure we don't grow too worried. The legendary Chan can't do much with this material either. His Han continues a series of late career moves meant to give him some unnecessary, non-action-oriented legitimacy. He's good, but still gives off the aura of being too skilled to play second fiddle to a rival master.
Plus -- and here's a sentence only a film critic would utter -- Harald Zwart is no John G. Avildsen. The latter, who helmed the original, has an Oscar (for Rocky) sitting on his mantle. The former found success spitting on Peter Sellers's grave with the awful Pink Panther update. Surprisingly, when given a less slapstick canvas to work with, Zwart shows some vision. It might not be enough to erase the iconic image of Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita out of our mind, but it does a decent job. Still, it's hard to see a reason for this remake. While it doesn't bring anything really bad to the mix, this new Karate Kid doesn't bring anything new either.
Popular kid Dre (Smith) is forced to leave his Detroit home when his Mom (Taraji P. Henson) gets transferred by the automotive interest she works for. The kicker? His new home is 6637 miles West...in China! At school, he befriends a talented violinist named Mei Ying (Wenwen Han) and continually runs afoul of notorious bully Cheng (Zhenwei Wang). One day, the maintenance man in his apartment building, Mr. Han (Chan), helps Dre out of another embarrassing beat down. Through some necessary plot contrivances, the old man convinces Cheng's master to let the newcomer enter an important kung fu tournament. As a result, Mr. Han becomes Dre's reluctant instructor, preparing him for what will eventually be a brutal contest.
The new Karate Kid lies somewhere between a success and cinematic blasphemy. Either you'll find it a rousing crowd-pleaser filled with heroes and villains and proper emotional beats, or it will represent the continuing rape of your already tenuous wonder years. It's hard to see a middle ground in the overly familiar material, especially since Chan and Smith hardly represent underdogs needing our collective concern. Those looking for parallels will either love or hate the "jacket on, jacket off" moment, as well as the crane-like snake move in the finale. Those with little frame of reference may well find themselves pleased with the well-worn and often crowd-pleasing storyline, but those who remember the original with formative fondness will probably just be aggravated.
There are other problems here as well. The movie is more padded than a supermodel's bra, clocking in at well over two hours. And not for a moment do we believe that Dre is really in trouble, even as Central Casting baddies beat him mercilessly. Similarly, though the choreography suggests a horrific ending to the tournament, the manipulative plot makes sure we don't grow too worried. The legendary Chan can't do much with this material either. His Han continues a series of late career moves meant to give him some unnecessary, non-action-oriented legitimacy. He's good, but still gives off the aura of being too skilled to play second fiddle to a rival master.
Plus -- and here's a sentence only a film critic would utter -- Harald Zwart is no John G. Avildsen. The latter, who helmed the original, has an Oscar (for Rocky) sitting on his mantle. The former found success spitting on Peter Sellers's grave with the awful Pink Panther update. Surprisingly, when given a less slapstick canvas to work with, Zwart shows some vision. It might not be enough to erase the iconic image of Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita out of our mind, but it does a decent job. Still, it's hard to see a reason for this remake. While it doesn't bring anything really bad to the mix, this new Karate Kid doesn't bring anything new either.
