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Less frenetic than its two predecessors, chapter three begins at the funeral of the two stars of the previous film (did they ask for a raise?) but reintroduces the chronically horny busty blonde Tiffani (Rebekah Kochan), who kicks things off by having sex in a coffin with a hunky priest. And away we go.
Tiffani's big assumption is that everyone is as hot and bothered as she is, and her mission is to make sure everyone has an equal opportunity to get his or her rocks off as frequently as possible. Her latest project is Casey (model/actor (with emphasis on model) Daniel Skelton, a guy The New York Times called a 'toothy irritant'). He's the new twink in town, a kid with a heart of gold who has no interest in the vain posing and meaningless hookups of West Hollywood. At Tiffani's urging, he attempts to seduce Zack (Chris Salvatore), a hunk who has caught his eye, by making a fake online profile and texting sweet nothings to him. But by choosing a profile photo of Tiffani's ex, the straight stripper Ryan (Michael E.R. Walker), Zack sets off a chain reaction of mixed-up identity scenarios, most of which end up in steamy sex.
With dialog such as 'F--- me like a day laborer,' 'I'm gayer than a Kevin Spacey/Anderson Cooper chicken wrap,' and 'Children are just abortions that eat,' the movie is at its best when guys are making out and modeling their underwear (with a shoutout to sponsor Andrew Christian) rather than talking. And as for the decision to make a straight woman rather than a gay man the real star not only of this installment but of all three Eating Out films, well, let's just call it one more blow to gay men's self-esteem. The assumption seems to be that a 'gay movie' can't be interesting unless there's a bodacious bimbo along for the ride to spew a stream of rapid-fire zingers about the shallow tribal rituals of the modern gay male.
Victoria's secret revealed...
