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The Young Unknowns

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Christopher Null
Christopher Null founded Filmcritic.com in 1995.
Even Less Than Zero?

It's the party of the year at Charlie's (Devon Gummersall) dad's. Well, it's the party of the week anyway. His girlfriend (Arly Jover) is around, and a couple of friends -- one loser (Eion Bailey) and one model (Leslie Bibb) join in the fun. That pretty much means drinking, drugging, and swimming in the pool.

Hardly a rager, the party takes a down note when Charlie's mother dies and gets the call from his absent dad. Much teen-angst philosophizing ensues. If Bret Easton Ellis had never lived, we might mistake this for depth instead of being merely derivative.

But alas, seeing a bunch of spoiled white people drown their pathetic sorrows in the drug du jour no longer evokes any pity or understanding. Our only experienced emotion is boredom, followed closely by annoyance. This is made worse by having pasty, white-bread Gummersall, the nerdy blond kid from My So-Called Life, spout ghetto lines as if he's from the 'hood, frequently using the word 'peep' as a verb meaning 'to speak.' Gummersall's 'bust a cap' persona is as affected as any I've seen since Anthony Michael Hall played a football hero in Johnny Be Good.

Much of The Young Unknowns is spent in wait; waiting for something -- anything -- to happen. Unfortunately, even big plot points like Charlie's mother's death are treated with all the gravitas of the consumption of a Slurpee. Charlie barely seems affected, so why should we? He's content to go on with his tribal chants, dick jokes, and 'yo yo yo!' soliloquies. The only saving grace: We do not have to listen to it.

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