A secret society so powerful it can get away with murder. A secret society so exclusive it firebrands everyone who joins with its mark. A secret society so secret... it has a big logo up on top of the building!?

You know something is rotten with The Skulls right from the get-go. I mean, what self-respecting prep school-Ivy League snob would join an organization with a name as stupid as "The Skulls"? Well, Luke (Joshua Jackson) would be, for one. Only he's no preppie. He's a "townie" with no money, but even though he's of the Lower Classes, since he's such a good rower (yes, "the skulls," I get it), he's a shoo-in for the secret society. A mysterious invitation arrives, and Luke is whisked into a world of power and money, where men in red robes usher in beautiful women for the taking at tuxedoed parties. Before you can utter "Fidelio," Luke has become One of Them.

Luke is soon partnered with a "soul mate" (not making that up), Caleb Mandrake (Meet the Deedles' Paul Walker) with whom he is supposed to keep no secrets. But uh-oh! when Luke's roommate gets jealous and threatens to expose the entire society when he steals Caleb's key to the secret chambers (remember, that big skull on the roof points the way in).

A cover-up ensues and Luke romances Popular star Leslie Bibb, and then come a grand series of plot twists so asinine you'll want to join in with the laughter and mockery of the audience if only doing so didn't make this movie even worse. Its desperate earnestness makes it even more laughable (with none other than Craig T. "Coach" Nelson lording over it all), and by the time 45 minutes are up, you'll probably be ready to leave. I know I was.

Unfortunately, teens don't read movie reviews, so this critique will likely be lost on anyone who cares. Would that they would put their collective foot down. The last thing we need is another bad movie that simply serves as an excuse to sell a soundtrack.



Jackson and Walker row their boat.